Living Far Away

Going to school nine hours away from home come be tough, especially when you see friends going home for the weekend or just for a family dinner.

That's the way it is for my roommate. He began to miss home, so he just went back for a Saturday. Then he was sick, and he could go home to his own bed. Everyone feels more comfortable in their own bed.

I hadn't expected to feel this way. Ever since I was 13, I just couldn't wait to get away from my parents. I loathed the restrictions they put on me, and whenever I was with them in a public place, I found it extremely embarrassing to be with them. I would spend most of my teenage years in my room chatting to my friends.

Now I was on my own. I had my independence, the thing I'd been wanting and waiting for all these years. I could stay out as long as I wanted, and wasn't responsible for feeding the dog. No-one asked what I'd been doing that day or that evening. And suddenly it didn't feel so good.

Despite the friends I'd made, I felt more alone than I ever had before, and much more than I expected. I didn't have a support system right by my side any more. I hadn't expected to miss my parents, but I did. A lot. And my friends at home, and the street we lived on, even the dog. I hadn't expected to feel that way, so it hit me hard. The only thing that kept me going was my new friends. Without them, I don't think I would have been able to make it. Actually, there was one person I knew of, a loner, who just gave everything up and went home. Before, I would have been totally unable to understand that. Now I do.

The worst time was the first long weekend, and there was only a small group of people left on campus. I was surprised to find that most of them seemed to feel the same way I did. We talked about it a lot. Worst of all was everyone coming back, talking about how great it was to see their families. I was even more down. I was soooo envious of them all, especially my roommate.

So when Christmas came, I couldn’t wait to be reunited with family, friends and my own bed. But since several of my new friends opted to stay at school, I felt I should tough it out too. It felt like a competition; who was strongest or most independent?

Something my mom said stuck with me when I mentioned this to her, "You don't win any medals for staying at school or being miserable." I decided she was right and booked my train ticket for 6:55 am the next day.