A Positive View of Sororities

I just got initiated into my sorority yesterday and I am pretty excited.

People put down the sorority and fraternity stuff because they don’t understand. So they judge it and stereotype it, especially the pledging and initiation part.

The whole process of pledging and being initiated is about getting to know the house, what it stands for, what the sisters stand for. It’s about getting to know each other. When you go through Rush, you go to all the houses to talk to people, see how they get along. If you stand for what their house stands for and have the same morals, you will cut your selections down to those you feel that way about. I do have to admit though that the process of Rush is a bit like speed dating.

At my school, like many others, we have what is called dry pledging where alcohol is prohibited during those 6 weeks. This means you can’t go out which can be a bummer, but also, you don’t have girls forcing you to drink (like people so often stereotype). I actually appreciate the whole dry pledging rule. During pledging you are learning so much about the house as well as trying to keep up with schoolwork; if drinking were involved I probably would have flunked out. Not going out during pledging makes you focus on the important things so you don’t fall behind in school. And in order to be in a sorority, you have to have and maintain a certain GPA.

People think that we as sorority girls don't have a lot to say. The thing is, we do. The sorority I am in has the highest GPA on campus; we regard ourselves as intelligent and hard working and want people to know that we do much more than party. Not all sororities are superficial.

Sororities are so much more than just being about parties. College is a huge change from high school. You need to learn to be independent and at the same time you are making all new friends. That's hard! First semester I was happy, but it took a lot of effort to meet new people. The girls in this sorority are the girls I have been waiting to meet since I got here. All at once, I have 150 new friends that I feel confident with. I know people might say "how could you like all 150 girls?" and the thing is, I really don't know. Whether you truly like the girl or not, just knowing that they believe in the sorority already gives you something in common. There's always someone to eat dinner with, workout with, hang out with, or go out with. Before I got involved with this sorority, there were so many days when I felt there was just nothing to do and I would stay in or watch a movie or go to the mall. I was bored. But now I feel there is always something to do. It's kind of hard to explain just how great it is, and this is coming from a girl who never ever thought she would be in a sorority; my family still can't believe it.

It’s a safety net; because you are all in the same sorority, you have some assurance that you are compatible with your sisters. I would feel comfortable calling upon any girl in my pledge class to do anything for me, even though I have known them for only six weeks. Mutual trust has built up because we’ve gone through a lot together in the past few weeks that makes us a lot closer. My sisters are supportive. On bid day, the day we got accepted, all of us pledges were so excited. But one of the sisters had a pretty intense family emergency the same day. She was happy about all of the new pledges but it was bittersweet because of what was going on with her family. The sisters were very supportive of her and it made me feel a real sense of belonging, of being amongst others who cared and who would care about me too when I needed it..

Being in the sorority makes me feel like I need to do better so that I can stay in it. It makes me manage my time better, kind of like a supportive parent would do. If I don’t do my work, everything that I have worked for can be taken away. I want it too badly to risk losing it.

Some people say they wouldn’t want to do it because of the stereotype that you are ‘buying your friends’. That’s what my mom thought at the beginning, until I got really into it. Now she sees the benefits to me and she doesn’t feel that way anymore. But I guess some people don’t understand and I guess it’s just not for some people

Some people have found that their relationships with the friends they had before they joined the sorority changed. They found it hard to stay close together and that they drifted apart due to being in different sororities. But it doesn’t have to be that way. You are closer to your sisters in a different way, but that doesn't mean for all girls that their relationships with their other friends change. My two best friends here are in different houses; I still plan on living with them next year and although I didn't get to see them as often as I would have liked during pledging, our relationships have stayed the same. You put effort into your sorority and getting to know it, but friends are friends.

It might be different for older girls who have been in the sorority longer, but it's really just a different type of relationship. You go through things as a pledge class that make you close. You are with them every night of the week for three hours a night intensely getting to know everything about each other, complaining about things together and having great times together. It really brings you together as a group. These are things I have not gone through with my friends outside of the sorority.

It’s easy to judge and to have your misconceptions about something if you are not involved with it and don’t know about it. But if you really go through the process and find out what sororities are all about, if you look at it objectively rather than judge it and assume that it’s like sororities are in movies, you can be involved in a truly amazing experience. It feels so different when you are involved!

Here on campus, there are so many groups to get involved in for people who don’t want to get into sororities. Many of these groups are similar to what you would get out of a sorority. There are sport teams and clubs and in a way, it’s kind of the same thing. You still make friends through the group to hang out with. Last year, I was on the track team and I would usually hang out with my team mates. They were my close friends. And I still hang out with them on the weekend even though none of them are in my sorority.

So don’t believe in stereotypes and what you think being a sorority girl means. Be open-minded. And if you want to do it, don’t make up your mind about which one until you learn about the houses. Even though you think you might know ahead of time what you want, you don’t really know until you make the effort to learn. And once you make up your mind, don’t get scared off by the pledging process. Just try it out and see what happens. Above all, it’s gotta be your call. You are the one who is going to be in it so don’t just do it because your sister liked it or your friend.

I believe there is a sorority and fraternity for everyone if they want it. I would have never thought I would ever be in a sorority. But for me, it’s the best thing I have ever done.